What lies behind us and what lies before us
are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

You are amazing!!

Do you want to meet the love of your life? Look in the mirror.
~Byron Katie

Every person in your life could tell you how amazing you are – everyday, but it won’t matter if you don’t feel that way about yourself.

People are like stained-glass windows.  They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within.
~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

Be your own light! Just like when you are falling in love with someone think of all the things that make you smile… about yourself. What are you proud of? What have you accomplished in your life that you worked hard for? What are qualities about yourself that you really like? What do you like, what movies, books, music, colors, seasons, foods, cities, activities…. The list goes on and on.

You are an interesting person, you have layers and complexities and a personal history that is unique and amazing. The thing is is that love of others and yourself has to be rekindled and kept fresh. Without exploring new things one gets board, this is human nature.

“Love doesn’t just sit there, like stone; it has to be made, like bread,
remade all the time, made new.
~Ursula K. Le Guin

Here is the hard part about the loving yourself…you have to love all of you including the parts that you are embarrassed by, ashamed of and terrified about. You do this for others, it’s what true friends are, people who care about and accept all of you. They stick out with you when you’re at your worst, they take care of you when you’re sick or down and they tell you they love you when you feel at your most unlovable. Why? Because they care about you and the depth of your friendship offers them something valuable that all of the other stuff is worth dealing with.

BE THIS TO YOURSELF. You are worth it.  Most of the time we judge ourselves by much harsher standards than anyone else, be forgiving, no one is perfect. I read a great statement on the refrigerator of one of my clients:

“I admit that I made a mistake.
I ask that all effects of that mistake be undone for all time.”
Anonymous

We ALL live sloppy, hard, challenging lives, and ALWAYS will mixed in with all the good stuff. A great life is not and will never be without its mistakes and mess-ups…accept it. The sooner you do the sooner you will have taken unnecessary pressure off yourself.

We also tend to compare ourselves to people around us whom we think are better than us. There will always be people who excel at things we want to be great at as well as people whom we do better then. Comparison only leads to disappointment.

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes.
~Sally Field

You deserve to have peace of mind, a heart full of love and a bright future. We all do. And we will get it by embarking on this journey of loving ourselves and therefore loving others.  Use the process to build compassion, forgiveness and open-mindedness. In a time fraught with turbulence, violence and uncertainty be a rock for yourself, you will inspire others to do the same.

“It is a given of life that nothing is permanently and finally satisfying. Despite this fact, many of us believe that somewhere there is a person that will be permanently satisfying. With mindfulness we find a pleasing balance between surrendering to the given of the fundamental un-satisfactoriness of life while at the same time maximizing our opportunity for contentment.”
~David Richo – Author of How to be an Adult in Relationship

QUESTION OF THE WEEK:
How can you create a love affair with yourself?